The Films of Steven Spielberg

I appreciate the fact that this blog feels very random at times.  Sometimes that's intentional.  But if you glance at the sidebar there is (at times) a method to my madness.  I recently posted The Movies of Arnold Schwarzenegger entry, which follows two other entries about 80s superstars, The Movies of Sylvester Stallone and The Movies of Tom Cruise.

This entry follows in turn two other entries centered around directors I like, The Films of David Cronenberg and The Films of Christopher Nolan.  So with this entry I've done three directors and three 80s action stars.  What's next?  I was thinking about three female stars of the 90s, perhaps followed in turn by three more directors, three male stars of the 2000s, three more directors and finally (if I ever get there) three female stars of the 2010s.

But we'll see.  Maybe I'll change my mind.  Maybe I'll forget.  Maybe I'll be struck by lightning before that happens.  Maybe I'll meet aliens at a remote location in Wyoming, and after that point this blog will be about my adventures on other worlds.

Anyway, on to Steven Spielberg's considerable filmography.

1970s

1. Duel (1970)

Dennis Weaver vs. Homicidal Truck Driver.  The charm of this movie might be lost on modern viewers, but in 1970s action/suspense movies usually weren't this tightly constructed, and the way in which Spielberg presented the story was unique at the time.  I can't say it's held up that well but it was a groundbreaking movie for sure.

2. The Sugarland Express (1974)

Like 1941 (below) this movie is somewhat forgotten now.  It was made in the early 70s and it feels like it was made in the early 70s.  If you're interested in how Spielberg developed his distinctive style it's worth seeing, but I don't think it deserves an 87% score on Rotten Tomatoes.  I'd probably give it a score closer to the year in which it was released -- 74% sounds about right to me.

3. Jaws (1975)

Still one of the best movies ever made.  The great Roy Scheider, Richard Dreyfuss and (especially) Robert Shaw were all perfectly cast, and there's a very human drama at the center of this movie about a killer shark.  Jaws had and continues to have a profound effect on the movies that have followed in its wake.

4. Close Encounters of the Third Kind (1977)

Also one of the best movies ever made, with Richard Dreyfuss starring as a man who witnesses the inexplicable.  Like Jaws it puts a very human conflict at the center of a seemingly inexplicable event.

The doorbells in my Taiwanese mother-in-law's apartment complex employ the "signaling tune" from this movie.  Every time I open her living room door I feel like I'm going to see aliens greeting me in the hallway.

5. 1941 (1979)

This was on HBO all the freaking time when I was little.  It paired well with 80s teen sex comedies, Chuck Norris' post-Vietnam exploits, or whatever other schlock HBO was showing late at night.  It's not bad by any means, but it's definitely one of Spielberg's more lightweight movies.  There are reasons discussions of his films usually leave it out.

1980s

1. Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)

Still one of the best action movies ever made, and probably THE best action movie of the 1980s.  Sometimes people like to get snarky with me and say that Raiders of the Lost Ark "isn't an action movie," and that argument always sounds very weak to my ears.  It's fun, it's violent and it leaves you wanting more.  Die Hard?  I think not!

2. E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial (1982)

I was the target audience for this movie when it came out, and yet I never understood the appeal.  It trades on a lot of kids being cute and improbable occurrences involving both the U.S. government and alien lifeforms.  Sure, we all wanted bikes that could fly, but I always felt that this was the movie I was supposed to like rather than the movie I actually did like.

3. Twilight Zone: The Movie (1983)

Spielberg only directed the "Kick the Can" segment in which the residents of a retirement home magically regain their youth.  It's a solid contribution, even if George Miller's segment is the most memorable.

4. Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (1984)

This sequel's a bit uneven, but the opening sequence is great and for the most part it captures the spirit of the first movie.  It might be too gruesome for its own good but I loved it as a kid.

5. The Color Purple (1985)

A real departure from what Spielberg had done before and a genuinely good movie all the way through.  Whoopie Goldberg, Oprah Winfrey and Danny Glover were all examples of perfect casting.  I've read the book as well and I think the movie does a good job of capturing the same mood.

6. Empire of the Sun (1987)

Christian Bale's first movie!  I've read J.G. Ballard's book, and I can tell you that while the movie's good the book is a whole other level of epic.

7. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989)

I liked it of course.  It's a lot more consistent than Temple of Doom.  But I don't know, something about this movie disappointed me at the time.  Maybe it was playing things a little too safe?  They'd done Judaism in the first movie, Hinduism in the second, so OF COURSE it was time for Christianity in the third one.  I dunno, I just wanted something more.

8. Always (1989)

A very forgettable movie.  Spielberg teams up with Richard Dreyfuss again, this time for a remake of a 1940s romantic drama that few people have ever seen.

1990s

1. Hook (1991)

Robin Williams stars as an older Peter Pan opposite Dustin Hoffman as Captain Hook.  It was a big budget Hollywood move released ahead of Christmas and it did predictably well.

2. Jurassic Park (1993)

I was 18 in 1993, so a bit too old for this movie to have the profound effect on me that it had on younger generations.  It's a fun movie, and the special effects were groundbreaking, but I can't say that it's one of the "greatest movies of all time" or anything.

3. Schindler's List (1993)

It blows my mind that Spielberg made Jurassic Park and Schindler's List in the same time period.  On the one hand you've got a big, fun movie about dinosaurs and on the other you've got a brooding, black and white meditation on the Holocaust.  People who only associate Liam Neeson with Taken really need to go back and watch Schindler's List.

4. The Lost World: Jurassic Park (1997)

In my opinion one of Spielberg's rare failures.  The plot is irrelevant and the ending falls flat.

5. Amistad (1997)

An overlooked movie, even at the time.  This tale of the slave trade put Djimon Hounsou on the map, and his status in Hollywood would only rise thereafter.  I think the courtroom aspect of this movie is a little tired and brings to mind much older movies from the 40s and 50s, but it's undeniably well done.

6. Saving Private Ryan (1998)

Tom Hanks leads a platoon into Nazi-occupied France to rescue a single soldier.  Aside from the battle scenes I think that what makes this movie great is its ambiguity.  Is it worth rescuing Private Ryan?  Did the ends justify the means?  This movie doesn't offer much of an answer and that's one of its strengths.

2000s

1. A.I. Artificial Intelligence (2001)

You know what took me 20+ years to notice?  This movie came out in 2001.  Spielberg took over this project from Stanley Kubrick who, as everybody knows, directed the science fiction epic 2001: A Space Odyssey.  A.I. is one of my favorite science fiction movies, though I'd rank this retelling of Pinocchio lower than both Close Encounters of the Third Kind and War of the Worlds.

2. Minority Report (2002)

I rewatched this recently, and even though it hasn't held up quite as well as some of Spielberg's other movies it's still good.  Tom Cruise solves "pre-crimes" with the aid of mutants that see the future.  It was adapted from a Philip K. Dick story and retains the author's signature sense of paranoia.

3. Catch Me If You Can (2002)

Spielberg + DiCaprio.  Yeah, it made perfect financial sense.  Up to that point DiCaprio's only real success as a leading man had been Titanic, but with a string of great performances in lesser-known movies under his belt he was clearly poised to do great things.  This said, I think this movie gets by on its sense of style.  It's certainly good, and it's not trying to be deep, but compared to other movies Spielberg's done it's just OK.

4. The Terminal (2004)

Tom Cruise and Tom Hanks both benefited greatly from collaborations with Spielberg.  In The Terminal Hanks stars as a man trapped inside an airport, with the lovely Catherine Zeta-Jones as a stewardess passing through his life.  I like this movie, but I'm also glad that Spielberg never ventured any further into rom-com territory.

5. War of the Worlds (2005)

One of my favorite movies.  Say what you will about Tom Cruise, he's amazing in this film.  From the word "go" War of the Worlds hits the ground running, building from a sense of dread to a sense of relief as mankind faces its darkest hour.

6. Munich (2005)

Like Amistad this movie's a bit overlooked.  Eric Bana should have been a lot bigger star than he was, but for whatever reason Hulk, Troy and Munich seemed to encompass Hollywood's love affair with Bana.  In Munich he stars as an Israeli intelligence agent exacting revenge after the bombing at the Munich Olympics.

7. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008)

That scene with Shia LaBeouf swinging with monkeys.  Yikes.  This movie just can't decide who its protagonist is.  It also relies heavily on CGI, and in doing so it strays from the practical effects that made the first three installments so good.

2010s

1. The Adventures of Tintin (2011)

I watched it.  It was OK, but I didn't love it.

2. War Horse (2011)

A completely forgettable movie.  Boy gets horse, boy goes off to war, boy is reunited with horse at the end of said war.

3. Lincoln (2012)

I get why Danial Day-Lewis' performance was praised but this movie was completely lost on me.  Like West Side Story (below) I tried watching it twice, but both times found myself unable to sit through it.  It describes a pivotal time period in American history, and Spielberg's previous movies like The Color Purple and Amistad in a sense led him to it, but for me it just fell flat.  Characters talk and talk and talk and so little seems to happen.

4. Bridge of Spies (2015)

Have I seen this movie?  I feel like I have, but I can't remember anything about it.

5. The BFG (2016)

Haven't seen it.  I'll probably watch it at some point.

6. The Post (2017)

I have a soft spot for movies centered around newspapers.  All the President's Men, The Front Page, etc., etc., etc.  Ah, the sound of typewriters clacking and printing presses churning.  As such movies go I don't think this movie holds a candle to All The President's Men, The Paper or Spotlight but it's not bad.  Bonus points for Bruce Greenwood, who should always be in more movies.

7. Ready Player One (2018)

Terrible movie adapted from a terrible book.  Spielberg attempts to resurrect the sci-fi cred he built up in the 2000s with this misguided exercise in 80s nostalgia.  It's heavy on CGI and extremely light on plot.

2020s

1. West Side Story (2021)

One of the darlings of this year's Oscar race.  I'm really not into musicals, but even I have to admit that it's a great looking movie.  I tried watching it twice, and fell asleep halfway through twice.  There are bits and pieces of it in my memory, but not enough to comment on the plot, the acting or any other aspect of the film.

2. The Fabelmans (2022)

It works from a dramatic standpoint but I don't think it deserves all the Oscars this year.  Michelle Williams is good as the protagonist's mother, but this movie isn't the insight into Spielberg's moviemaking technique that I was hoping for.

Related Entries:

The Movies of Arnold Schwarzenegger

Thoughts on Marvel's She-Hulk: Attorney At Law

Some Other Movies From 1940-1949 (2)

Some Other Movies From 1940-1949

The Movies of Sylvester Stallone

I have this theory that "the modern film" goes back to 1977's Star Wars.  And no, I'm not going to add an "Episode" to that title.

Or, if not Star Wars, then movies like Jaws and the Rocky.  The first Rocky, by the way, was one the first movies to use a Steadicam, a feature which is evident to those scrutinizing the jogging scenes and comparing them to tracking shots of objects in motion from films of previous years.

Rocky was Stallone's baby.  He wrote it, he starred in it, and he made it happen.  Director John G. Avildsen might have won Best Director for it, but it never would have happened without Stallone.

Aside from the above, I have another theory, that "the modern movie star" dates back to the 80s, to guys like Tom Cruise, Stallone and (of course) Schwarzenegger.  These are the guys who benefited most from the emerging VHS/home video market, and these are the guys who capitalized on the interplay between MTV and motion pictures.  No, these guys weren't putting out videos for MTV, but their movies were very soundtrack heavy, and aimed squarely at the MTV generation.

With all of this in mind I now turn to the filmography of Sylvester Stallone, one of the most American of movie stars.  Both he and Schwarzenegger stand at the center of Reagan's decade, and both he and Schwarzenegger cast a long shadow over the decades of movies to follow.

The 1970s

The Square Root, Downhill Racer, M*A*S*H, Lovers and Other Strangers, The Sidelong Glances of a Pigeon Kicker, Bananas, Klute, What's Up, Doc?, The Prisoner of Second Avenue, Mandingo, Farewell, My Lovely

Stallone paying his dues.  He wasn't even credited for many of these films.  You can see some of them on YouTube.  I watched what I could find (I'd already seen M*A*S*H and Klute), and none of it was particularly good.

The Party at Kitty and Stud's

Softcore porn in which he plays "Stud."  After Rocky became a surprise hit it was re-released as Italian Stallion for obvious reasons.  You can see the trailer here.

No Place to Hide

Stallone's first starring role, released two years before Rocky.  I haven't seen it, and none of the cast or crew members went on to do anything noteworthy.  The full movie is here.

The Lords of Flatbush

I know I've seen this... I just can't remember anything about it.  Something about gangs in New York?  For whatever reason I always get this movie mixed up with The Warriors.

The fun thing about this movie is the story that goes with it.  Apparently a young Richard Gere was cast in a smaller role early on, and he and Stallone did not get along.  At one point this led to Stallone elbowing Gere in the head.

Capone

A bigger role for the young actor.  You can see a bit of it here.  Pre-Rocky he was getting offered more gangster-type roles.  It's weird seeing him opposite Ben Gazzara.

Death Race 2000

A better remembered movie.  Back in the 80s film afficionados might have been familiar with The Lords of Flatbush, but many more people knew Death Race 2000 - and Stallone's appearance in it - from its broadcasts on TV.  David "Kill Bill" Carradine stars, with Stallone in a lesser role as one of the other racers.  It's a very mid-to-late 70s kind of movie.  Roger Corman produced both this and Capone.

Cannonball

It's easy to get your "Cannonball" movies confused.  There were three movies based on the famous cross-country road race, these being The Gumball Rally, The Cannonball Run and Cannonball.  Very few have seen The Gumball Rally, The Cannonball Run was the Burt Reynolds hit, and Cannonball featured David Carradine once again driving a car.  Stallone's brief appearance in the last of these movies is by far the most amusing of his early cameos, given the fact that he shares his scene with Martin Scorsese.  The whole movie is here.

Rocky

The surprise hit that won several Oscars and spawned countless imitations.  It's one of the great 70s movies, anticipating further successes for many of those involved.  Those who put up the money for this production gambled big and won big.

Stallone wrote the script for Rocky in a little over three days.  Everybody loved it.  What they didn't love was the fact that Stallone (via his agents) insisted on playing the lead.  Had Stallone not insisted on playing Rocky, this movie would have starred a much bigger actor and would have had a much bigger budget.

F.I.S.T.

Stallone cemented his newfound reputation by starring in and co-writing this film about labor unions.  Norman Jewison, who'd directed Rollerball the year before, was a good choice for director.  It remains a very overlooked movie that showcases its star's potential.

Paradise Alley

His first outing as director.  This look at the world of professional wrestling was very poorly received, and Stallone himself wasn't enthusiastic about the final product.  He wrote the screenplay before Rocky, but had trouble securing the rights to it later on.

Rocky II

After the first Rocky's ambiguous ending, this was the rematch everyone was waiting for.  Stallone wrote, directed and starred in it, but co-star Carl Weathers contributed a lot in terms of charm.  Definitely not as good as the first movie, but a decent sequel and also the last movie Stallone would make in the 70s.

The 1980s

Nighthawks

I'll agree with Stallone that this look at domestic terrorism was slightly ahead of its time.  It's by no means a perfect movie, but it's still enjoyable.  Stallone plays a New York city cop tracking down European terrorist Rutger Hauer.

Fun Fact 1: Does Rutger Hauer's girlfriend/accomplice look familiar?  That's Persis Khambatta, who appeared as Lieutenant Ilia in Star Trek: The Motion Picture.  She came to Hollywood from Bollywood.

Fun Fact 2: Emerson, Lake and Palmer's Keith Emerson wrote the soundtrack for this film.  It's great.

Fun Fact 3: Stallone ended up directing and editing this movie after many of those involved in the production were fired.

Escape to Victory

Now here's an obscure one.  It was fairly popular during its theatrical run, but faded into obscurity thereafter.  I'm guessing that it wasn't shown on TV much, and that it wasn't widely available on VHS.  A lot of the early 80s "hits" were like that.

It's described as a "sports war movie" on Wikipedia.  I haven't seen it, but the combination of Stallone, Michael Caine and Max von Sydow has me intrigued.

Rocky III

It's easy to get your Rockies confused.  This is the one where he fights Mr. T.  Any kid who grew up in the 80s remembers this movie.  I also, by the way, owned the Sega Master System game.  Most people would put Rocky II above Rocky III, but for me the stakes just seemed higher in this movie.  It's also hard not to love Hulk Hogan's appearance in the beginning.

First Blood

Oh yeah.  This movie was HUGE.  Something about it just hit the nail right on the head.  Stallone as emotionally damaged Vietnam vet, the antagonism he experiences, the stunts, Brian Dennehey and Richard Crenna's commanding performances - it's all there.  America in the early 80s was a nation still trying to process the Vietnam War, and this is a movie that captures that period of national uncertainty.

Fun Fact: David Caruso is in this.  It was his fourth movie.

Staying Alive

This is the sequel to Saturday Night Fever.  Stallone is in it for a second, as is his brother Frank.

Rhinestone

Fucking terrible.  Not as bad as Staying Alive, but still terrible.

Rambo: First Blood Part II

On one level this movie is ridiculous.  Stallone running through Vietnam, abs for miles, dodging bullets like they were wrenches - and always remember that if you can dodge a wrench you can dodge a ball.  But I digress.  Anyway, yeah, it's ridiculous, but it's still a well executed (if entirely implausible) action movie driven by Stallone's presence, director George P. Cosmatos' skill, and a screenplay written by both Stallone and James Cameron.

Critics hated it, BUT IT KICKS ASS.

Rocky IV

In some ways 1985 was the pinnacle of Stallone's career.  Not only did Rambo: First Blood Part II hit theaters, but around the same time Rocky IV also appeared in local cinemas.  And yes, like First Blood Part II this one went for all the marbles - no matter how implausible those marbles might have been.

Fun Fact 1: Russia?  Nope, they filmed those scenes in Wyoming.

Fun Fact 2: Lundgren was criticized for his aggressiveness during filming.  At one point Carl Weathers threatened to quit after finding himself pinned in a corner of the ring.   Lundgren also hit Stallone so hard that it sent him to intensive care.

Fun Fact 3: The robot in this movie was a real, functioning robot, not a prop.  It was used to treat Stallone's son's autism, and was taken on tour with James Brown.

Cobra

Fuck yeah Cobra.  This movie gets SILLY and that's what makes it great.  Is there a more "80s" movie than Cobra?  I'm really not sure.

Stallone stars as Marion Cobretti, a no-nonsense cop with a thing for axe-wielding cult members.  It's violent, it revels in 80s movie tropes and it's stupid fun.  George P. Cosmatos directed this one too, and Brian Thompson is a great villain.  It was a big influence on Nicolas Winding Refn's Drive.

Fun Fact: This movie started out as Beverly Hills Cop.  Really.  Stallone made his own pitch for that film, and was set to star in it before Eddie Murphy entered the picture.

Over the Top

Stallone attempts to do for the sport (?) of arm wrestling what he did for boxing.  He plays a trucker with an estranged son, and this soundtrack-heavy movie serves as a reminder that yes, even the 80s come to an end.  In terms of quality it's on par with Hulk Hogan's magnum opus No Holds Barred, and like both that movie and Cobra it can be a lot of fun if you don't take it too seriously.

Rambo III

The worst Rambo?  I dunno, in its way it's less mean-spirited than the last two.  This is the one where Rambo joins the Taliban in their fight against the Soviet occupation forces.  I can remember owning the Sega Genesis game.

Lock Up

I know I've seen it but I can't remember.  Couldn't have been that good.

Tango & Cash

Released the same year (1989) as Lock Up, and also features a prison escape.  Kurt Russell was a replacement for Patrick Swayze, who at the time was a hot property due to the success of 1987's Dirty Dancing.  Like Over the Top and Cobra it's silly fun.

The 1990s

Rocky V

The worst Rocky!  Yes, by unanimous decision!  A battered and bruised Rocky decides to train a young boxer by the name of Tommy Gunn.  Somehow the street fight at the end just feels sad.  This movie will make you glad they decided to do Rocky Balboa later on.

Sad Fact 1: Sage Stallone, Stallone's eldest son, played his son in this movie.  He died of atherosclerosis in 2012.

Sad Fact 2: Tommy Morrison, who played Tommy Gunn, is also dead.  He died of AIDS-related complications in 2013.

Oscar, Stop!  Or My Mom Will Shoot!

Really bad.  Don't bother.

Cliffhanger

A return to form.  If you don't get this movie you probably didn't see it in the theater.  At the time it was best viewed on a really screen with a good sound system.  Watching it on a smaller screen isn't the same thing at all.  John Lithgow hams it up throughout.

Fun Fact: There were plans for a sequel centered around... Hoover Dam?

Demolition Man

You don't get more early 90s that this movie.  John Spartan... gotta love that name.  Stallone stars as a supercop thrown into the future, with a neon-haired Wesley Snipes as his criminal adversary.  Taco Bell hasn't won the Franchise Wars YET, but some of us would still welcome in this future if the opportunity arose.

Fun Fact 1: Stallone initially wanted Jackie Chan to play the villain, but Chan turned it down.  Snipes only accepted after rejecting the project several times.

Fun Fact 2: There was a scene in which Stallone fought Jesse Ventura which was cut from the film.

The Specialist

A very forgettable movie.  Sharon Stone was trading on her sexuality at the time, and Stallone had been around the block and back.  The scenes between him and Eric Roberts are good though.

Judge Dredd

Is it as good as Dredd?  Hell no.  Is it the worst movie of all time?  Definitely not.  I read a lot of Judge Dredd comics in my younger years, and at the time I was gratified to see one of my favorite characters on the big screen.  Keep in mind that it was 1995, and we were judging this (heh heh) against earlier comic book adaptations like Batman Forever and Richard Donner's Superman.

Assassins

The only interesting thing about this movie is the Wachowski's involvement.  It was one of the first scripts they sold, and was written around the same time as Bound.  In Assassins Stallone squares off against fellow hitman Antonio Banderas.  It's not great, but not as bad as I thought it would be.

Daylight

Stallone trapped in a tunnel.  Viggo Mortenson's appearance as a sports equipment mogul is kinda fun, but overall this movie isn't very good.

Cop Land

A more dramatic role.  It's cool seeing Stallone opposite guys like Ray Liotta, Harvey Keitel and Robert De Niro.  Yes, Stallone plays the hero, but James Mangold's direction piles on the suspense and the characters are engaging. 

Men in Black, An Alan Smithee Film: Burn Hollywood Burn, The Good Life, Antz

Not much Stallone in any of these.  Stallone ended up suing the production company over The Good Life, which actually stars his brother Frank Stallone.  He voiced one of the ants in Antz.

The 2000s

Get Carter

I've seen it but I can't remember.  Couldn't have been good.

Driven

I've also seen it but can't remember.  Race cars, yeah, I remember race cars.  That's it.

D-Tox

Have I seen it?  Not sure.  From the Wikipedia entry it sounds like a disaster.

Avenging Angelo

Haven't seen it.  Sounds terrible.

Taxi 3

This one I remember.  It's a fun little movie, but Stallone's only in it for a second.

Shade

It got decent reviews, and Stallone plays the heavy in it.  I'll probably check it out one of these days.

Spy Kids 3-D: Game Over

I remember this movie very well because my daughters were young at the time and they watched this movie endlessly.  It's for kids, it's ridiculous, but it knows what it is and who it's for.  Stallone plays the villain.

Rocky Balboa

GREAT movie.  Probably my favorite in the Rocky series.  I love the interactions between Rocky and Paulie in this movie, and Stallone's willingness to humble his character for the sake of the story.  I have that "nothing hits harder than life" speech committed to memory.

Rambo

Rambo mows down a bunch of guys in Myanmar.  Didn't this hold the record for most onscreen deaths for a while?  Maybe it still does.  It's not so much that it's a bad movie, just that it's completely forgettable.  After a while the violence has a numbing effect, and the movie just passes you by without your being aware of it.  It's not as bad as the most recent Rambo, but that's not saying much.

In my opinion the problem with the Rambo series is that it never stays true to the character as laid out in the first movie.  By the end of First Blood we see a very damaged man who faces a long road (forgive the pun) back to a normal life.  But from First Blood Part II onward the character is little more than an excuse for another war movie.  Don't get me wrong, I love First Blood Part II - it's one of the most 80s movies ever - but in dramatic terms they probably should've stopped with the first one.  First Blood Part II could have been centered around a different character.

Kambakkht Ishq

Stallone was in a Bollywood movie!  Only for a few seconds though.

The 2010s

The Expendables

This kind of nostalgia was always lost on me.  So what if all these guys from the 80s are starring in one big 80s action movie circlejerk?

Fun Fact: Terry Crews' part was almost played by Forest Whitaker.

Zookeeper

Stallone voices the lion.  I haven't seen it.

The Expendables 2

Still an 80s action movie circle jerk, but I think it was better than the first one.  As a child of the 80s I have to admit that it was cool seeing Stallone and Van Damme in a movie together.  Arnold Schwarzenegger, or "Trench Mauser," also has one of the funniest names ever.  On the negative side, Chuck Norris looks too old to have been much use to anybody.

Bullet to the Head

Walter Hill.  I've liked a couple of his movies, but this is not one of them.

Escape Plan

They made THREE of these?  Really?  I had no idea.  Stallone buddies up with Schwarzenegger again (they appeared together in Expendables 2), and the two of them try to escape a super prison.  It's a decent movie.

Homefront

Stallone wrote it.  I've seen it but I don't remember much aside from James Franco being a good villain.

Grudge Match

TERRIBLE movie.  It's so terrible it manages to tarnish the impressionS left by both Rocky and Raging Bull, two indisputably great films.  At first I was going to say I hadn't seen it, but then I realized I'd repressed the memory.

The Expendables 3

My favorite of The Expendables movies, if for no other reason than Mel Gibson.  He's genuinely scary in this film, and his scariness makes the final fight much better.  It was the least profitable of the Expendables movies, but I think what put a lot of people off at the time was just the PG-13 rating.

Fun Fact: There will probably be a fourth one.  At the time of writing Statham, Stallone, Banderas and Lundgren are still signed on for this project.  The list of their potential costars is a who's who of 80s superstars which includes Pierce Brosnan.  They seem to offer this franchise to anybody who was anybody back in the day.

Reach Me

Haven't seen it.  The reviews of this low budget drama are not great.

Creed

After the first Rocky and Rocky Balboa this is my third-favorite film in the franchise.  Like Rocky Balboa it explores the relationships between fathers and sons, with Michael B. Jordan starring.  Just forget that Rocky V exists and watch this instead.  You can always go back to Rocky V later.

Ratchet and Clank

Stallone voices a robot.

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2

Stallone plays Yondu's pirate adversary.  I'm not a big James Gunn fan, but this movie is OK.  It should be noted that Stallone will appear as King Shark in The Suicide Squad, also directed by James Gunn.

Animal Crackers

Another kids' movie.  Stallone voices "the human cannonball."

Escape Plan 2: Hades

I remember it being bad.

Creed II

Not as good as the first one, but that's not surprising.  In terms of quality I think it belongs next to Rocky II.  Creed III, directed by Michael B. Jordan, should hit theaters next year.

Backtrace

Never heard of it.  The idea of Sylvester Stallone and Matthew Modine starring in a movie together seems weird.

Escape Plan: The Extractors

Also hadn't heard of it.  Is it accurate to say "direct-to-video" about a movie released in 2018?  Wouldn't "released on streaming service" be more accurate?

Rambo: Last Blood

One of the last movies I saw in a theater since both the coronavirus and the Trump presidency put the world into a blender.  I really wanted to like this one, and the previews looked good, but it goes from semi-realistic to ridiculous very quickly.  And no, it's not an enjoyable First Blood Part II kind of ridiculous.

Stallone was accused of xenophobia after this movie was released.  I don't think that criticism was fair.  Yes, releasing this movie alongside Trump's "build the wall" rhetoric was bad timing, but anyone who thinks parts of Mexico AREN'T that messed up needs to read some of that country's recent news stories.

What really rubbed me the wrong way about this movie was the granddaughter character.  Something about the way in which she dies, and also  the way in which Rambo deals with this situation is very, very crass.  And that ending?  I couldn't help but laugh.

Fun Fact: At one point this was going to be a science fiction movie, with Rambo leading a team across the border to pursue a genetically modified creature.  Maybe they thought that premise was too similar to Predator?

One Night: Joshua vs. Ruiz

Boxing documentary which Stallone produced.

The 2020s

Samaritan

Kids' movie about superheroes.  Guess who's playing the washed up superhero from yesteryear?  Production was delayed due to COVID-19.

The Suicide Squad

Stallone joins the DCEU.  It should be out next month.  It would have to be REALLY bad to be worse than the first one.

The Good, the Bad and the Execrable

So, with all of the above stated, which movies should everyone see?  And which movies are best avoided?  I would break it down thusly:

Excellent: Rocky, F.I.S.T, First Blood, Rambo: First Blood Part II, Rocky IV, Demolition Man, Cop Land, Rocky Balboa, Creed

OK: Everything else.

Don't Do It To Yourself: Staying Alive, Rhinestone, Rocky V, Oscar, Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot!, Grudge Match, Escape Plan 2: Hades, Rambo: Last Blood

And that, my friends, is all I have to say about Sylvester Stallone.  Writing this entry has brought back a lot of memories, and searching through Stallone's filmography has given me at least a couple movies to seek out.  Can you guess whose filmography I'll be discussing next?  Perhaps another cast member from The Expendables franchise?  A certain Austrian-born ex-politician known for his bodybuilding prowess?

Related Entries:

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Some Other Movies From 2005 (2)

Movies of the Early 2000s, Ranked in the Order I Enjoyed Them

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The Movies of Tom Cruise

Tom Cruise would probably rather you forget how old he is.  Yet when you think about it, the guy's been around forever.  Seriously, even the "older" movie stars like Liam Neeson and Hugh Jackman were just starting out when Tom Cruise was already an established name.  His first movie, Endless Love, hit theaters way back in 1981.

Between 1981 and now, everyone's favorite Scientologist has starred in over 30 films, and that's not counting other films in which he acted as producer or narrator.  If I were to count those other films, the total would surpass 40.

He is, by the way, 53 at the time of writing.  The rest of us can only hope we look that good at 53.

1980s

Endless Love

God this movie is bad.  Not only that, but it's really icky.  Some of the oedipal stuff going on this film might have made for great drama given an entirely different screenplay, but as it is it's a mess.  Tom Cruise is in it for about five seconds.

Taps

His career really began with this movie.  He's not the star, but he plays one of the older cadets.  It's still a good movie, and it has held up well over time.

The Outsiders

This is one of those movies that's fun to rewatch with an eye to its stars' future career paths.  Hey, is that Matt Dillon?  Is that Ralph Macchio?  Is that Tom Cruise?  Yes, it's Tom Cruise, and no, he's not in this movie for very long.

Losin' It

Typical 80s teen sex comedy, inexplicably set in the 50s.  Cruise's first starring role, and not that awful as these kind of movies go.  Even so, I wouldn't bother with it if I were you.

Risky Business

The movie that made Tom Cruise (and Rebecca De Mornay) famous.  If you're wondering what happened to Rebecca De Mornay, just check out the Netflix Jessica Jones series - she plays Trish's mom.  This movie, like Losin' It, was one of those teen sex comedies that HBO played endlessly in the 80s.

All the Right Moves

Hey, isn't that Chris Penn?  And look, Leah Thompson!  I defy you not to get this movie's (bad) soundtrack stuck in your head.  A football player tries to escape small town Pennsylvania.  Fairly forgettable.

Legend

I loved this movie when it came out (I was 10), but like many other movies on this list it hasn't aged that well.  I recently tried to sit through the Director's Cut, and found myself unable to do so.  Mia Sara was used much better in Ferris Bueller's Day Off.

Top Gun

God this movie is gay.  Just go back and (re)watch it, and count the closeups of Tom Cruise's ass.  That volleyball scene alone has got to be one of the most homoerotic things put into a mainstream Hollywood film.  It's terrible.  Just terrible.  And not because it's gay.

The Color of Money

Paul Newman reprises his role from The Hustler, and Cruise plays an aspiring pool shark.  It's definitely a good movie, but I always thought it left something to be desired.  Maybe it's the fact that the characters aren't very likable?

Cocktail

One of the most unintentionally hilarious movies ever made.  Tom Cruise plays a bartender, and the tragically underrated Elisabeth Shue plays his love interest.  So bad it's actually pretty good.

Rain Man

I consider this the first really good, really entertaining film starring Tom Cruise.  He manages to hold his own against Dustin Hoffman, and it won a lot of Oscars.  Worth seeing if you haven't seen it already.

Born on the Fourth of July

Kind of a sequel to Platoon (forming a trilogy with the not-very-good Heaven and Earth), and directed by Oliver Stone during the high point of that director's career.  I think it has aged better than Platoon, a film which suffers in comparison to other films like The Deer Hunter, Full Metal Jacket, and even Hamburger Hill. 

1990s

Days of Thunder

Pretty bad.  Tom Cruise (inevitably) plays a race car driver.  This is the first movie in which he and his wife-to-be Nicole Kidman starred together.  Cruise had been around for a while, and Kidman was a rising star from Australia.  Tony Scott's directorial style was never quite up to the level of his brother Ridley.

A Few Good Men

Still a great movie.  I saw this again not long ago.  Cruise plays a lawyer involved in a military trial.  Demi Moore is probably the best thing about it, but Cruise does well in his role and is likable throughout.  Also one of Jack Nicholson's best films.

Far and Away

Cruise and Kidman again.  This one was directed by Ron Howard, and follows a pair of Irish immigrants on their journey through the wilds of frontier America.  It's not all that good, but it's a vast improvement over Days of Thunder.

The Firm

A lawyer uncovers a conspiracy.  This movie is... alright, but not worth seeking out.  Author John Grisham, who wrote the book, was the Dan Brown of the early 90s, and in many ways this movie resembles The Da Vinci Code (minus the religion, of course).

Interview with the Vampire

Cruise surprised a lot of people with this one.  In it he plays the vampire Lestat, the "hero" of Anne Rice's novels.  Brad Pitt costars, himself on the way to superstardom at the time.  It's a good movie, and compares favorably to the book.

Mission: Impossible

It seemed like a lower-rent James Bond film at the time, and it doesn't look any better now.  It took them a while to find out what worked and didn't work in this franchise, and Jason Bourne wasn't helping matters any.  It's not bad, but not great.

Jerry Maguire

"Show me the money!"  Yes, this is that movie.  Tom Cruise plays a sports agent who decides to act in his clients' best interests.  I have never understood the adulation this movie gets.  I tried to watch it again, just to make sure I was giving it a fair shake, and I still don't get it.  Cameron Crowe, who directed Cruise in Jerry Maguire, would do so again in Vanilla Sky.

Eyes Wide Shut

Now HERE is the one Tom Cruise film everybody ought to see!  It is, in my opinion, a masterpiece, though by no means is it a good date film.  Leave your significant other elsewhere, and delve deeply into this tale of (possible) infidelity and suspicion.  Kubrick saw something in Cruise that no one else has.

Magnolia

Yeah, that sing-a-long bit at the end is weird and almost ruins the whole movie, but anyone complaining about Cruise's acting skills ought to see Magnolia.  He plays a motivational speaker in southern California, and his performance in this film is undoubtedly one of the best - if not the best - of his career. 

2000s

Mission: Impossible II

This movie was a huge disappointment.  I remember being a huge fan of John Woo at the time, and I was expecting this movie to kick ass.  What we got instead was the worst film in the franchise, and one of the worst movies of Tom Cruise's career.

Vanilla Sky

This movie marks the beginning of Cruise's descent into science fiction (aside from Scientology, I mean :P).  It also marks his second pairing with Cameron Crowe.  I liked it a lot more than Jerry Maguire, but this movie always seemed a little hollow to me.

Minority Report

More sci-fi, but this time with Stephen Spielberg.  Also one of the best adaptations of a Philip K. Dick story.  Great movie.

Austin Powers in Goldmember

Cruise is in this for about a second.  It's terrible.

The Last Samurai

Good period film about an American living in Japan.  I think one of the strengths of this movie was that men and women could like it equally.

Collateral

Cruise finally teams up with Michael Mann.  It's a good movie, but I never understood all the praise it received.  I kind of want to watch it again.

War of the Worlds

Quite possibly my favorite Tom Cruise movie AND my favorite Spielberg movie.  I've seen it more times than I can remember.  Martians (or at least aliens) invade the Earth.  You've read the book, right?

Mission: Impossible III

Better, but still not there yet.  All I can remember about this movie is that Maggie Q is FINE.  I know I've seen it, but the rest of it has escaped my memory.

Lions for Lambs

Blah blah blah, cut to marines stranded in Afghanistan, blah blah blah, repeat.  Few things are worse than movies that try especially hard to be meaningful, but just aren't.  By the end you'll be wondering why the senator (Cruise) wasted so much time talking to the reporter (Streep), and why the professor (Redford) wasted so much time talking to his student (Garfield).  I have no idea why Cruise's character didn't just hold a press conference, or what Redford's character was trying to convince his student of.  And hey, why didn't those two marines have radios?  Or satellite phones?  Or cell phones?  Or any other way of contacting their commanding officer?

Tropic Thunder

Tom Cruise was in this?  I really don't remember that at all.  I doubt Wikipedia is lying, so I'll just take their word for it.  I never understood why people like this movie so much, though Robert Downey Jr. is good.

Valkyrie

Tom Cruise as a Nazi colonel?  With his American accent?  He gives it the old college try, but just about every scene he's in pulls you right out of the movie.  Hearing him scream "Long live sacred Germany!" is hard on the ears.  In fairness to Cruise, George Clooney, Matt Damon, or any other recognizable American actor would have been equally ridiculous in the role. 

2010s 

Knight and Day

Well-written, well directed action movie that was overlooked at the time.  Cameron Diaz makes this movie.  I really enjoyed it.

Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol

As far as I'm concerned, this is the first good movie in that franchise.  I still consider Ethan Hunt a far cry from either Jason Bourne or James Bond, but it's a solid film.

Rock of Ages

Tom Cruise as an aging 80s rock star?  First time I heard this I was like "Whaaaat?"  But in retrospect it makes a lot of sense.  I'm not into musicals, but I have to admit that he was great in this one.

Jack Reacher

By-the-numbers action movie.  Casting Werner Herzog as the villain was an interesting choice, but this entire movie seems like a foregone conclusion from the moment the suspect writes "Find Jack Reacher."  Someone must have liked it, because a sequel's on the way.

Oblivion

I don't get all the hate this movie receives.  Cruise battles aliens on a post-apocalyptic Earth.  It's not as action-oriented as Edge of Tomorrow, but it's still an excellent science fiction film.

Edge of Tomorrow

One of Cruise's more recent breakthroughs.  This movie was something of a sleeper when it first came out, but its fan base has expanded dramatically.  Kind of a sci-fi version of Groundhog Day.  One of the best action movies to come out in 2014.

Going Clear: Scientology and the Prison of Belief

Tom Cruise probably wishes he wasn't in this documentary, but it includes a lot of footage of him partying with the other Scientologists.  And how could it not?  At this point Cruise is the most famous Scientologist on the planet, and the "church's" practice of grooming celebrities is largely predicated upon their association with him.  I highly recommend it (the documentary that is, not Scientology).

Mission: Impossible - Rogue Nation

I was all set to dismiss this one, but in the end it won me over.  That scene where Cruise somehow holds his breath for EONS is ridiculous, but it's a good movie and definitely the best in the franchise.

On the Way

Jack Reacher - Never Go Back (2016)

Actually, I sort of wish Jack Reacher would go back.  That first movie was fairly derivative.

Mena (2017)

This one sounds like it might be good.  Cruise plays a pilot working for the DEA.  Every few years he does a good dramatic film, and this sounds like it could be interesting.

The Mummy (2017)

Part horror film, part attempt to copy Marvel's success with its interconnected cinematic universe.  It could also be considered both a sequel to the forgettable Dracula Untold and a reboot of Brendan Fraser's Mummy franchise.  Russell Crowe will be playing Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde, and I can only assume that the guy from Dracula Untold will be returning.  I'll be happy if it's good, but my hopes aren't high. 

Fun Facts About Tom Cruise 

He has been nominated for three Academy Awards, but he's never won the Oscar.

He was 19 when he appeared in his first movie, the above-mentioned Endless Love.

He claims that Scientology cured his dyslexia.

He's been married and divorced three times.  His first ex-wife was Mimi Rogers, who introduced Cruise to Scientology.

October 10 is "Tom Cruise Day" in Japan!

Allegations of homosexuality have haunted Cruise throughout his career.  He's gone to court several times over supposed "evidence" of his preference for men.

Tom Cruise's Five Best Films

1. War of the Worlds

2. Eyes Wide Shut

3. Edge of Tomorrow

4. Rain Man

5. A Few Good Men

And with that, I'll close the book on Tom Cruise.  Next time maybe... Tom Hanks?  Nicole Kidman?  Sylvester Stallone?  Someone else?