Still More 90s Movies 3: 1995-1997

I'll be adding to this as I go along.

1. Sense and Sensibility (1995)

A sumptuous retelling of Jane Austen's novel from Taiwanese director Ang Lee.  It might sound boring but give it a chance.  I'm not a big fan of Austen's novel but this adaptation brings its characters and their struggles into sharp focus.

Fun Fact 1: Star Emma Thompson also wrote the screenplay.  It took her five years to do so.

Fun Fact 2: This was Lee's first Western movie.  His style of filmmaking was universally praised at the time, but his method of filmmaking was a frequent source of tension between himself and the mostly British cast.

2. The Juror (1996)

Demi Moore is great in this movie.  She plays a juror coerced into delivering a "not guilty" verdict, and the scenes between her and costar Alex Baldwin are riveting.  The ending is a little implausible, but it's solid overall.

Give it a chance?  Critics despised it, but in my opinion it's very overlooked.  The director, Brian Gibson, helmed What's Love Got to Do with It three years before.

3. Boys on the Side (1995)

Half derivative road movie, half enjoyably eccentric take on three women coming to know one another in Tucson.  Goldberg, Louise Parker and Barrymore are all excellent in their respective roles, with Goldberg being the standout given her nuanced portrayal of a woman struggling against an unrequited love.

4. The Nature of the Beast (1995)

Predictable, yeah, but anchored by great performances from Eric Roberts and Lance Henriksen.  This one's a noir picture, and despite its unsurprising twists and turns it was nicely done.

5. Eddie (1996)

Say what you will, Whoopi Goldberg could carry a movie.  Eddie is an extremely forgettable vehicle for her, but she remains convincing throughout and the story, although predictable, clips along easily enough.  You'll probably forget the plot aside from "Whoopi Goldberg coaches the New York Knicks" seconds after watching it, but as sports movies go I'd give it a passing grade.

Briefly Disconcerting Fact: Donald Trump is in this for a second.  Eddie was the fifth film he appeared in.  His Atlantic City hotel and casino also appears in Empire Records (below).

6. Waiting to Exhale (1995)

Forest Whitaker shows himself an indifferent first-time director.  This movie fails to walk a line between drama and comedy, the result being a decidedly lopsided film with a couple funny moments and a couple scenes that make more dramatic impact.

I'm guessing the book was better?

To make matters worse, Angela Bassett, two years past What's Love Got to Do With It, easily outshines every other actor she shares scenes with, with the possible exception of Wesley Snipes.  Whitney Houston never manages even half of Bassett's screen presence, and we're instead left with vignettes of a very pretty woman who struggles to find love in a vaguely defined context.  Lela Rochon does a competent job, but she's not in much of the movie.

I walked away from this film feeling unsatisfied for another reason, this being the question of what the film's three (or four) protagonists really want.  Why seek a lasting, committed relationship in the arms of men who are so clearly not ready for that?  In the end you can only wonder at these three (or four) women's judgement, given that the men they so often choose to bed down with are so obviously lacking in the qualities they desire.

Do they all live happily ever after?  I suppose they do, but happiness in the hands of such fickle people can only ever be fleeting.

7. Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls

Jim Carrey delivers a characteristically restrained performance.  Early 90s Jim Carrey was all about subtlety.  If you've seen the first one you'll know what to expect.

8. DNA (1996)*

Mark Dacascos plays a lower rent version of Indiana Jones.  Something something serum beetle monster something.  I enjoyed watching Jurgen Prochnow ham it up as the villain.

Fun Fact: The formula on the blackboard is actually the formula for KFC's "11 herbs and spices."  So... there's beetle juice in the KFC chicken?  What happens if we order it three times?

9. Empire Records (1995)

Really wasn't feeling this one.  I get that it's a cult movie, but I have no desire to join that cult.

Empire Records follows the employees of a music (CD) store for a day, with their personal dramas playing out against the backdrop of the store's imminent closure.

Younger viewers (those not old enough to remember the 90s) will probably recognize Liv Tyler and Renee Zellweger, but the rest of the cast didn't go on to anything particularly noteworthy.

For someone my age (I was 15 to 25 in the 90s) there's a certain nostalgia in this trip through the aisles of the local CD emporium, but in my opinion the script was only a step away from Friends.  It's not even close to the worst movie I've seen lately, but I had trouble focusing on it for any length of time.

10. Hologram Man (1995)

I'm guessing this was some kind of passion project for villain (and screenwriter) Evan Lurie?  Action hero and Christlike co-star Joe Lara certainly didn't seem to be a motivating factor.  

There are so, so many movies like this: the earnestly produced, sparsely budgeted film that someone thought would make them a star.  So many of them end up on YouTube, and so many of them find new life one that platform, serving as testaments to good intentions gone bad.

Demolition Man is the easy comparison here, but there's also The Lawnmower Man to consider.  This dialogue is wretched, the special effects aren't special, and the whole thing is often unintentionally hilarious.  Give it a go if you're in the mood.  You might be able to make more sense of it than I did.

11. The Stupids (1996)

This movie makes a certain kind of sense given the release of Dumb and Dumber two years earlier, but it is in most other respects a baffling creation.  A John Landis-directed comedy starring Tom Arnold?  A running joke about a homeowner chasing a garbage truck?  Hilarity ensues... or does it?

No big surprise - The Stupids bombed hard.  I will say, however, that it seems like the kind of movie that'd go over big in foreign markets.  It was too early to bank on China, but a decade or so later it might have done really well there.

Fun Fact: David Cronenberg has a cameo in this.

12. The Final Cut (1995)

Not nearly as bad as Hologram Man (above), but much poorer for it.  The Final Cut finds bomb specialist Sam Elliot contending with a serial bomber, and if you haven't anticipated the ending long before Sam Elliot does you just haven't seen enough movies.

Related Entries:

Still More 90s Movies 2: 1992-1994

Still More 90s Movies: 1990-1992

Still More 80s Movies 5: Oscar Winners

Still More 70s Movies 5: Oscar Winners

*Wikipedia says 1997, not 1996.  IMDb's date agrees with YouTube.

"Lies and Weddings" by Kevin Kwan (2024)

"Bea glanced at Solene.  'Didn't you just have a big show in Miami?'

"'She sure did!'  I bought one of her paintings,' Freddy proudly declared.

"Solene looked surprised.  'Did you really?  Which one?'

"'Just Shut Up and Blow Me.'

"'That's a bit rude, Freddy!' Bea scolded.

"'No, no, that's the name of her painting,' Freddy explained.

"Solene nodded.  'Yes, it's part of my latest series.  It's my examination of toxic masculinity, based on actual words my exes would say to me.'"

Kevin Kwan's books have been discussed here several times already.  He's the author of Crazy Rich Asians and its two sequels, and also Sex and Vanity, which is the one book by him I haven't read.  He's something of a latter-day Anthony Trollope, poking fun at the rich, famous and powerful while at the same time bringing his fiction into a very modern context.

If you've read his other books you won't find Lies and Weddings that surprising, though it is one of his funnier books.  In this contemporary fairy tale a young female doctor becomes romantically entangled with a wealthy British family's only son, and even though the ending's extremely predictable both the humor and characterization are flawless.

I'm assuming I missed Sex and Vanity because of COVID.  I've never even seen it for sale in a bookstore.  If I ever come across it I'll be sure to give it a go.  Lies and Weddings was a very enjoyable read, and I'd be glad to say that I read all of Kevin Kwan's books.

Related Entries:

"The Redbreast" by Jo Nesbo (2000)

"Mecca" by Susan Straight (2022)

"Human Acts" by Han Kang (2014)

"Intermezzo" by Sally Rooney (2024)

Still More 90s Movies 2: 1992-1994

A lot of these movies were direct-to-video.  It was the early- to mid- 90s after all, and Blockbuster was still king.  YouTube just isn't as reliable for this time period due to a combination of factors.  Below is what I could find, make of this selection what you will.

1993, by the way, was the year I graduated high school.

1. LA 92 (2007)

Not a 90s movie but a powerful documentary very relevant to the time period.  Rodney King's beating at the hands of L.A. police and the subsequent L.A. Riots are both pivotal events in recent history, and this still-cogent analysis of what led to those two events offers many insights which remain, for the most part, outside of public discussion.

2. Little Women (1994)

Pitch perfect adaptation of Louisa May Alcott's novel.  As evidenced by the movie selections in these entries I'm a dude who likes dude things, but just the same Little Women had me tearing up at certain points.  It deserved its three Oscar nominations.

3. Short Cuts (1993)

Some of the scenes are implausible and some of the characters' motivations are a mystery, but this movie's been on my mind a while now.  Robert Altman directed this after The Player, and like that earlier film it was something of a return to form for him.

It's hard to describe the plot aside from "things happening in L.A. before a momentous event," but don't let the intricacy of this film (or its length) put you off.  Despite its occasional obscurity it's still worth the effort.

My favorite scene has to be the argument between Julianne Moore and Matthew Modine near the end.  I don't want to give too much away, but the juxtaposition of her vulnerable state and the kind of conversation they're having is very arresting.

4. Gladiator (1992)

No, not that Gladiator!  The other one, from 1992!

It's a fairly derivative boxing movie in which a white boy battles his way through the hood, but the performances are solid and the screenplay was watertight.  The only puzzling thing about it is the montage near the end, which consists of a series of scenes which feel like they should have been the most important parts of the movie.

Fun Fact: Star James Marshall would appear in A Few Good Men the same year.

5. Sleepless in Seattle (1993)

I'd seen this movie, but as I was scrolling through Netflix one day I realized that I couldn't remember a single thing about it.

In case there's somehow someone on this Earth that doesn't know already, Sleepless in Seattle is a romantic comedy set in - you guessed it - Seattle.  I watched it for views of my hometown in the early 90s, but taken on its own merits it still holds up.

6. Boiling Point (1993)

Surprisingly... not a bad movie.  Or at least the screenplay was good, with indifferent direction and bad editing.  The only question is whether Wesley Snipes is really the lead in this movie, given that Dennis Hopper has as much, if not more screen time as Snipes does.

It was fun seeing Valerie Perrine and Viggo Mortenson in Boiling Point, and Lolita Davidovich brought back a lot of memories.  In the hands of a better director this movie could have been amazing, but as it is I'd only give it a passing grade.  Wesley Snipes would appear in both Rising Sun and Demolition Man the same year, so this one quite naturally fell by the wayside.

7. Excessive Force (1993)

On par with Boiling Point above, though I'd give a slight edge to Boiling Point on account of Dennis Hopper.

In Excessive Force Thomas Ian Griffith front kicks, side kicks, spin kicks and jump kicks his way through a host of bad guys, while Burt Young, Tony Todd, James Earl Jones and Lance Henriksen handle most of the acting.  If someone had given the lead role to a more polished, less kick-happy actor this movie would have been something else altogether, but as it is Excessive Force is very comfortable within its chosen genre.

I like to imagine a trilogy of Excessive Force films, each worse than the one before it.  Excessive Force would spawn Unreasonable Force, and by the time they got around to Ridonkulous Force they'd be filming in some formerly communist country, where people drink far too much soup and smoke cigarettes with unpronounceable brand names.

Fun Fact: Griffith's first movie role was "Terry Silver" in The Karate Kid Part III.  He later revisited this role in the Cobra Kai TV show.

8. Ordinary Magic (1993)

Hey, it's Ryan Reynolds!  This was his first movie ever.

Ordinary Magic is about a Canadian boy raised in India returning to his home country.  Once established in the Great White North this boy discovers that an evil land developer (played by Paul Anka!) has designs on his family estate.  What's our yoga-practicing hero to do?

I kind of enjoyed this one.  Reynold's accent is not awesome, and the recreations of India look very staged, but Paul Anka hams it up nicely and the ending, despite a failure to demonstrate why the townspeople are so affected by Reynold's character, does manage to make an impression.

9. Ladybugs (1992)

Rodney Dangerfield coaches a girls' soccer team.

1992 was probably the height of both Dangerfield and costar Jonathan Brandis' careers.  After Ladybugs (and in Brandis' case, Sidekicks) followed a series of movies that few remember.

Director Sidney J. Furie also helmed classics such as The Ipcress File and The Boys in Company C in the 70s, as well as The Entity and Iron Eagle in the 80s, but by 1992 he was just glad to have another movie.

I'd put Ladybugs very far down in Dangerfield's filmography.  By 1992 movies like Back to School and Easy Money were distant memories, and he'd spend most of Ladybugs "doing standup at people" rather than acting.

Fun Fact: Jonathan Brandis won his role over Leonardo DiCaprio, whom the producers passed on because he was too convincing as a girl.

10. Monolith (1993)

Not so much a movie as a cry for help, but hey, at least it's not as boring as some of the movies below.

Whatever happened with this movie, mistakes were clearly made, and one can only feel sorry for Bill Paxton, Louis Gossett Jr. and John Hurt, three actors who probably regretted their involvement in this film later on.

The weirdest thing about Monolith aside from its somewhat nonsensical sci-fi premise is the scenes wherein a minor character is clearly carrying on a conversation with no one at all.  I'm guessing that by that point the principal actors had all fled to safety, and that these connecting scenes were only added to make the film slightly more coherent.

11. A.P.E.X. (1994)

Watchably awful Terminator ripoff involving no one who went on to fame and fortune afterward.  It features some truly primitive CGI and a killer robot that wasn't fooling anyone.  If you can make sense of the ending you were paying much, much more attention than I was.

12. Zero Tolerance (1994)

FBI agent Robert Patrick (minus his liquid metal shapeshifting ability) escorts a friendly cartel member back to the loving arms of the U.S. of A.  The somersault count in this movie is off the charts, it makes almost no sense, and whatever reason Miles "Tarzan" O'Keefe is in it.

I was very drunk off rum when I watched this.  Its sheer ridiculousness was very welcome.

13. Airborne (1993)

A laid back California surfer dude brings the exotic sport of "rollerblading" to the Midwest.  Or something.  I wasn't paying that much attention.  Seth Green was an industry veteran by this point, but Airborne was Jack Black's second movie following a brief appearance in Bob Roberts the year before.

14. T-Force (1994)

The only actors I recognized in this were "Bennett" (!) from Commando, "Malibu" from the American Gladiators TV show and Erin Gray from the Buck Rogers film and TV show.  The plot is buddy cop movie meets Universal Soldier and the budget was LOW.

15. Dark Angel: The Ascent (1994)

A smokin' hot demon fresh from hell dispenses justice on the streets of... Romania?  It's about as "direct-to-video" as you can get.

The theology employed by this movie is somewhat interesting.  Would demons pray?  And what would that even mean?  This movie is a far cry from Paradise Lost, but it does offer a couple interesting ideas of the relations between heaven and hell.

I just can't help but wonder whether the humor is intentional or otherwise.  They had to have known what the protagonist's fake wings would look like on camera, but then again there's an earnestness to some of the performances that seems to belie that fact.  Fearless Vampire Killers it's definitely isn't, but it did have me thinking.

16. Martial Outlaw (1993)

Don't ask me what the title means.  I guess they thought the words "martial" and "outlaw" sounded cool together.

I have nothing positive to say about this movie aside from the fact that it's not nearly as excruciating as Peter's Friends below.  Two brothers in law enforcement part ways over Russian mobsters operating in Los Angeles.

17. The Stand (1994)

Life imitates art.  Art imitates life.  Around and around we go.

Stephen King's book wasn't the first novel centered around a virus, but it was the first novel to put both the virus and its aftermath into a more epic context, something more akin to J.R.R. Tolkein that Robin Cook or Michael Crichton.

And while I'm a big fan of some of Stephen King's books, I can't say that I'm a big fan of The Stand, a book I read in high school.  In my opinion the 1000+ page tome doesn't have enough of a plot to justify its length, and its ending has to be one of the most frustrating things ever.

All of the problems present in the novel are also present in this 6-hour long TV miniseries, and on top of that there's both its relatively low budget and its soap opera-level dialogue to consider.  I can remember people liking it at the time, but it didn't do much for me.

18. Lightning Jack (1994)

Cuba Gooding Jr. learns how to be an outlaw from Australian Paul Hogan.  The ending of this movie is a complete nonevent, with the two protagonists sneaking out of town without ever really encountering the men chasing them.  I'll give it a few points for Beverly D'Angelo, but for the most part it's painfully unfunny.

19. Only You (1994)

One of the more nauseating rom-coms I've seen lately.  Marisa Tomei and Robert Downey Jr. were dating at the time, having met on the set of Chaplin a couple years earlier.

The ending of this movie is completely and utterly unconvincing, even by rom-com standards.

Fun Fact: Marisa Tomei's first movie was 1984's The Toxic Avenger.

20. Peter's Friends (1992)

Insufferable British people (plus one American) gather at a manor to celebrate New Year's Eve.  This film only further confirmed my strong dislike for Kenneth Branagh.  Yes, he's been in a few good movies, but I am, overall, not a fan.

Related Entries:

Still More 90s Movies: 1990-1992

Still More 80s Movies 5: Oscar Winners

Still More 70s Movies 5: Oscar Winners

Still More 60s Movies 5: Oscar Winners

"The Pancatantra" by Visnu Sarma (Date Unknown)

"So, when Chaste had laid her eggs on the strand, the Ocean, who had been listening to the previous conversation of the lapwing pair, now thought to himself: 'Oho!  Well, well, well; if there isn't sound sense in the saying:

"'Fearing that the sky might fall down,

"'the lapwing rests with feet stretched up,

"'Who in the world is not conceited

"'O'er the image he creates of himself!'"

The Pancatantra is a very, very old book, and its author, much like Homer, is probably more a myth himself than an actual person.  If he ever existed he would have lived well over a thousand years ago, and his medium of composition would have been, according to tradition at least, Sanskrit.

The content of The Pancatantra (or "Panchatantra") is a lot easier to describe than its origins.  It is a book (or series of books) written for the instruction of princes in the art of statecraft, with its narratives consisting of animal stories which are nested one inside the other.  It bears a lot of similarities to The One Thousand and One Nights, a much later work which was almost certainly influenced by The Pancatantra.

Visnu Sarma's (or "Vishnu Sharma") work is divided into five sections, each focusing on a particular aspect of a ruler's function and duties.  Each section contains a framing narrative in which the animal (and occasionally human) characters contend with one another, with various characters interrupting the framing narrative to offer stories or parables which illuminate whatever point is being made.  It can be a dizzying read at times, and it's often hard to remember who's talking, or which sub-narrative is being discussed.  The Pancatantra requires a lot of concentration from its reader, and I can't say that I was always up to the task.

This book is also, it must be admitted, extremely misogynistic.  The female characters in the Pancatantra are almost always lascivious, deceitful and easily duped, while most of the male characters, when exhibiting similar failings, are always given the benefit of the doubt.  The status of women in whatever society or societies gave birth to The Pancatantra must have been low indeed, and this low regard for the female sex often mediates against whatever wisdom The Pancatantra's stories are trying to impart.

On top of all this there's the problem of extracting some kind of insight from what is, at its heart, an extremely contradictory work.  For every "thou shalt" offered by its characters there's an equally appealing "thou shalt not," and one can't help but wonder what people in ancient times would have made of The Pancatantra beyond the weird interest to be found in stories of men imitating gods, gods imitating men, and lion kings beset by bad councilors.

As someone with an interest in Indian religion and philosophy who's also read The Upanishads, The Mahabharata and similar works, I can't say that The Pancatantra is required reading.  It does shed a certain light on several works of world literature that came after it, and I did find parts of it memorable, but I wouldn't say that it was, on the whole, worth the effort.

Related Entries:

"The Naked Ape" by Desmond Morris (1967)

"The Silk Roads" by Peter Frankopan (2015)

"Circe" by Madeline Miller (2018)

"The Song of Achilles" by Madeline Miller (2012)

Still More 90s Movies: 1990-1992

From 1990 to 1992 I was a high school student.  It wasn't a good time in my life.  If YOU'RE a high school student, and if you're even close to as miserable as I was, just know that it gets better.

1. Paris Trout (1991)

A small town shopkeeper exacts a terrible revenge after a customer refuses to pay back a loan.  This movie has its issues: the relationship between Dennis Hopper's character and his mother could have been demonstrated better, the ending isn't the slam dunk you want it to be, and I wasn't buying the love triangle, but the performances are great and there are two scenes in this movie that are truly hard to watch.

Paris Trout never arrived in theaters, but instead went straight to Showtime.  It was directed by Stephen Gyllenhaal, Jake Gyllenhaal and Maggie Gyllenhaal's father.

In another timeline Dennis Hopper was a much bigger star.  It's almost a shame he was so erratic at pivotal points in his career.  Then again maybe that same eccentricity is exactly what led him to so many memorable roles.

2. Neon City (1991)

Vanity was FINE.

...and I like the idea of a "bright."  In terms of storytelling you could go in a lot of different directions with that one.

Neon City, like Omega Cop and its sequel Karate Cop below, is essentially a Western set in the near future, with the differences being that Neon City had an actual budget, a competent director, people who could act and an above average screenplay.  In it Michael Ironside plays a bounty hunter on a quest for revenge, with Vanity as a bounty he picks up along his way.

It's a surprisingly good movie.  In the city/town scenes the lower production values show, but other than that it's well acted and interesting throughout.

3. The Favour, the Watch and the Very Big Fish (1991)

The most French English-language movie you're likely to see.  The Favour, the Watch and the Very Big Fish offers a very whimsical love story in which Bob Hoskins plays a devotional photographer, Jeff Goldblum plays a would-be Jesus, and Natasha Richardson plays the object of their affections.  It's far from the best thing any of the actors involved have done, but it's very charming nonetheless.

4. Men at Work (1990)

It doesn't really get "funny" until Keith David shows up, but real-life brothers (and mullet aficionados) Charlie Sheen and Emilio Estevez have a lot of chemistry.  Estevez was also a serviceable director as early 90s comedies go. 

Men at Work was filmed and edited somewhere between the first Young Guns and Young Guns II, at a transitional point in both Sheen and Estevez's careers.  Estevez would go on to do The Mighty Ducks and Another Stakeout, while Sheen's credits include Navy SEALs and Hot Shots!

5. Moon 44 (1990)

Director Roland Emmerich's sixth movie, and the last before his departure from then-West Germany for the sunnier hills of Hollywood.  His following movie would be 1992's Universal Soldier, and from there he'd move on to Stargate and Independence Day.  I think I might like his West German catalog.  Those movies look weird.

And hey there's Michael Pare!  Whatever happened to Michael Pare?  Well, post-The Philadelphia Experiment he did (and is still doing) a whole lotta movies you probably never heard of, unheard-of classics such as Elite Target and Shark Island.

The rest of the cast?  Well, there's the bad guy from Cobra, "Evil Ed" from the original Fright Night and, of all people, Malcolm McDowell.  I guess he was free that weekend.

The "plot" is something like a prison movie meets Top Gun in space - but with helicopters.  Just don't ask me what they're mining on that planet, or why whatever they're mining is so important.  Those parts of the movie don't make much sense.

6. Omega Cop (1990)*

There's "so bad it's good" and then there's "so bad it's better."  This one, along with Moon 44 above, definitely belongs to the latter category.

Star Ron Manchini predicated his brief but obscure career on Chuck Norris once referring to him as "tough," and from a stint in the pages of magazines like Black Belt he went on to do a series of action movies you've probably never heard of.

In Omega Cop the near future is beset by solar flares which inexplicably turn people evil, leaving Manchini to contend with the mutants and/or murderous cancer survivors plaguing Los Angeles.

Manchini, it must be said, was an actor of such ability that he made even Chuck Norris look like a polished thespian, and his entourage of struggling actresses only show him to further disadvantage.

Oh, and Adam West (TV's Batman!) plays Manchini's boss.  The scenes the two of them share are probably the highlights - or maybe I should say lowlights - of the movie.

7. Masters of Menace (1990)

David Rasche (Sledgehammer!) and his gang of Roadmasters terrorize the "straights," with hilarity ensuing.  Alongside Men at Work this is one of the two more professionally produced 1990 films discussed here, even if it features a cast better known from television and went direct-to-video.

That Confederate flag wouldn't, if you'll excuse the pun, fly now, but this movie does a decent job of maintaining that Animal House vibe.  Some of the gags are still funny, and the cast is very engaging.

Fun Fact: Dan Aykroyd, Jim Belushi and John Candy all appear in this movie.

8. Karate Cop (1991)**

"I'd like to, but my feet are killing me!"

"...and everybody else!"

The sequel to 1990's Omega Cop.

Ron Marchini returns to dispense justice in a post-apocalyptic wasteland, this time with slightly higher production values.  It's not as enjoyably crappy as Omega Cop but it's good for a few laughs.

David Carradine pops up in this one.  In 1991 his career wasn't exactly flourishing.

9. Nothing but Trouble (1991)

I must have seen this back in the day.  As I sat watching it I began to remember some of the lines.  I'm sure I never saw it in the theater, so it must have been on cable at some point.

It's far from perfect, and I'm not sure that the house full of traps is used as effectively as it could be, but Nothing but Trouble is relatively fun and still somewhat amusing.  Director Dan Aykroyd and John Candy do double and triple duty as other characters in the film, and Chevy Chase was always a serviceable straight man.

The part I'd completely forgotten was Demi Moore.  In 1991 she was between Ghost and A Few Good Men.  When you think about "Bobo" and 'Lil Debbull" in Nothing but Trouble, and then flash forward to Moore's role in The Substance, this movie seems very prescient.

And hey, check it out!  Digital Underground!  If you squint real hard you can just make out a young Tupac Shakur in their midst.  This was his first movie, and no, he wasn't in Digital Underground very long.

Fun Fact: This movie was to some extent inspired by Hellraiser.

10. Sidekicks (1992)

Critics DESPISED this one, but then again that's not surprising.  Chuck Norris was never their favorite actor.

The thing is, they were onto something with Sidekicks.  Instead of making Norris responsible for the drama, it places him inside Jonathan Brandis' daydreams, thus putting the weight of the story on the rest of the cast.  This was, I think, a strategy that worked very well indeed.

Jonathan Brandis, by the way, had a hard time of it post-Sidekicks.  He went on to a series of increasingly (or maybe I should say decreasingly) lower budget films until 2003, the year in which he committed suicide.  In the span of ten years or so he went from teen heartthrob to Hollywood nobody, and the descent into obscurity was very difficult for him.

Fun Fact: If Brandis' teacher looks familiar it's because she's played by Julia Nickson-Soul, who also played Stallone's love interest in Rambo: First Blood Part II.  The "Soul" in her last name came from then-husband and fellow actor David Soul, whom she later divorced.

11. Wilding (1990)

You know you're in trouble when the editor decides to share all the key moments from the movie in the opening credits.  Why?  Because that was all the film they had!  No money left over for a credit sequence!

Helmed by John Travolta's older brother Joey and the inestimable Wings Hauser, this one's so bad it demands to be seen.  It was filmed in Yuma, Arizona of all places, and none of the cast and crew went on to fame and fortune afterward.

12. Fifty/Fifty (1992)

Peter Weller (Robocop) and Robert Hays (Airplane!) team up to take down a third world dictator.  As a project this movie has an interesting history: it began life as a Sylvester Stallone/Eddie Murphy vehicle, morphed into a Sylvester Stallone/Kurt Russell vehicle, and was later abandoned to the likes of Weller and Hays.  At the time Weller had just appeared in Robocop 2, and Hays hadn't done much Airplane 2: The Sequel nearly ten years before.

This movie was something of a last gasp for Cannon Films.  By 1992 their best years were behind them, though the company would be restructured in several forms up until the present day.

13. The Boneyard (1991)

Horror "comedy" that isn't especially funny.  If you ever want to see the difference between actors with presence and actors without this is the film to watch.  Phyllis Diller and Norman Fell weren't exactly Hollywood heavyweights, but even so their short appearances in this movie distract mightily from the other, less emotive actors in their midst.

14. Seedpeople (1992)

Charles Band, that latter-day Roger Corman, brings us this latter-day ripoff of Invasion of the Body Snatchers.  It might have been cheesy fun if the gore wasn't constantly interrupted by tedious stretches of soap opera-worthy dialogue.

15. Amityville 1992: It's About Time (1992)

The clock idea is/was interesting.  Maybe if they'd just taken that, and focused in on every room in the house inhabiting a different time period, or on time moving faster or slower in each room, they could have built up to the idea of each member of the family moving through a different causal loop, with these loops converging in the movie's final scenes.

Yeah, that could have worked.  But instead of that we got (and are getting, and will get) another lame haunted house movie wherein the various characters' actions don't make much sense, both from their own perspectives and from the perspectives of other characters inhabiting the same movie.

16. Liebestraum (1991)

Sometimes "sexy," mostly pretentious film noir offering from director Mike Figgis.  Figgis would be nominated for Best Director and Best Adapted Screenplay for Leaving Las Vegas a few years later, and there are elements of that movie in this one, but it's not nearly as good.

17. Short Time (1990)

HA HA HA blood diseases are HILARIOUS!!

Or not.  Dabney Coleman (!) stars as a cop on the verge of retirement notified that he only has a short time to live, with Matt Frewer (a.k.a. "Max Headroom") as his partner and Teri Garr (!) as his ex-wife.

And NONE of it is even remotely funny, despite the fact that this was supposed to be a comedy.

18. Spaced Invaders (1990)

Invading Martians are mistaken for trick or treaters and Halloween hilarity ensues.  Or does it?

This is the kind of movie I remember from the late 80s/early 90s: kid-friendly films with a lot of sequel and merchandising potential.  The scripts for a lot of these movies?  They were beside the point.

19. The Dream Machine (1991)

You've seen Corey Haim in The Lost Boys; maybe you've also seen him in License to Drive or Dream a Little Dream, but what about The Dream Machine?  Have you ventured down that particular rabbit hole yet?

No?  If so, good for you.  This movie just CRAWLS by, with neither a single laugh nor a single titillating moment to be found in its 1.5 hour runtime.  It was obviously made for Haim's teenage fans, most of whom had already deserted him by 1991.

20. Denial (1990)

Robin Wright and Jason Patric mope around and say cryptic things to themselves, each other, and whoever else is handy.  If you've ever had to sit through a particularly tedious drama class, this movie feels exactly like that.  One of the most excruciating things I've seen in a long time.

Related Entries:

Still More 80s Movies 5: Oscar Winners

Still More 70s Movies 5: Oscar Winners

Still More 60s Movies 5: Oscar Winners

Still More 80s Movies 4

*Some sources say 1989, not 1990 on this one.  It was probably direct-to-video, so I doubt it matters much.

**The video on YouTube is of extremely poor quality.  Sadly the Criterion version was not available!